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Source: https://www.glamour.com/story/15-sex-industry-workers-in-their-own-words

 

Sex work" can be a fraught term in our culture. For those of us who grew up on the most common depictions of people who work in the sex industry, the phrase might conjure images of tragic women who have been trafficked into selling sex against their will. And although that type of sex work is very real, there's also a much richer tapestry of those who work in the sex industry than what we're often exposed to through news stories and pop culture. The real stories of webcam models, dominatrices, and porn stars are often very different from the tropes we see in flashy (and often irresponsible) headlines about sexdrugs, and crime. In fact, plenty of sex workers truly love what they do.

 

Glamour spoke to 15 women who work in different facets of the sex industry—porn performers, dominatrices, and cam models—about their choices to enter the business. Even beyond the financial freedom and the ability to travel that their career paths afford, many of them emphasized how they use their platforms to draw attention to social causes, highlight the contributions of marginalized communities, and help destigmatize sex. Below, in their own words, they tell us how they got their starts and what working in the sex industry has allowed them to accomplish.


 

Angela Demir

webcam model
 

"Before camming, I was a theater major that also did modeling. I then worked on a TV program, but I couldn’t meet my financial needs. I tried waitressing, which only earned me $350 per month working eight-hour shifts. I saw a job posting about camming and thought it was some kind of sex job: 'That’s appalling!' But it's actually the opposite. It’s changed my life for the better, and I’m so happy I did it! You think camming is just sexual exposure, but it’s so much more than that! It’s like art, to be honest.

"The first year was constant work, but I saved enough money and bought a great apartment that is now my home. I’m also thinking of starting my own business now so that I can invest more in myself, thanks to the money I bring in just from camming."


Ariana Marie

adult film performer, model, and dancer
 

"You see, I always did well in school, but it didn't hold my attention. So although I'm sure I could have made it through college, I don't know if I would have had the patience for it.

 

"Since [getting into] the adult industry, I've been able to pay off all my debt, put thousands of dollars a month in savings, increase my credit score to near perfection, buy my own house and car, travel when and where I want, start several businesses, help friends and family in need, help pay for my own wedding, and live a comfortable, financially stress-free life. All of this before turning 25 years old. I cannot imagine that I could have accomplished this without my adult film career.

"For some people who may not have other options, this industry can be a…way to a more positive path in life."


Bratty Nikki

financial dominatrix
 

"I couldn’t be happier with my career choice as a financial dominatrix. [For] a young woman, it’s rare to be financially free and independent and have stability. I feel very grateful to be in such a position. It’s also really cool to have a limitless creative outlet, knowing I’ll never be bored or face the same boring routine day to day. My job is always interesting!

"Being an online dominatrix has changed my life in so many ways that most people usually only dream of—time, money, freedom, and the ability to help out my loved ones. [It] is a decision I’ll never regret. I bought my retired mom a new car last Christmas, and I’ve never been more proud of myself! Seeing her face light up and her car stress disappear when she saw the big red bow on her new car was the best feeling ever."


Brett Rossi

adult film performer and director
 

"Most important, porn has helped my self-confidence not only in how I view myself but also as an entrepreneur and businesswoman. Porn has given me the ability to make my own schedule and travel to places in the world that I likely would have never had the opportunity to visit if I were not in the adult industry.

"I’ve had more doors open to me in other aspects that I love, such as writing, performing stand-up comedy, and animal rescue. If I had never gotten into porn, I don’t believe I would have been able to meet the people or access the resources I have now that have given me the ability to do what I love and be 100 percent, completely in control of my career, my schedule, and my daily life choices."


Chelsea Poe

adult film performer
 

"The ability to make a living doing something you're passionate about, and can creatively fully invest in, is something all artists dream of. Without my medium being porn, I don't think it would be possible [for me] as a young trans woman. Porn has given me a platform to represent my sexuality on my own terms, [which] allowed me to survive and escape as a trans woman from rural America. I started in the industry due to lack of employment options in a small Midwestern town; then I discovered people using the industry to show their identity, politics, fantasies, and creativity.

"I believe I am extremely blessed to be in this industry, which has given me a platform to tour with my films—from Tokyo to Berlin to London to Vancouver—and truly be able to meet trans and queer people [for whom] my work is making a difference in their life. When I, as a viewer, looked to porn for representation, it was extremely hard to find performers that I could connect with until coming across trans women like Tobi Hill-Meyer and Drew Deveaux, who really laid the ground for what I could do [as] a trans woman porn filmmaker and performer. So my goal is to hopefully do the same for others."


Delice

webcam model
 

"This job fulfills you in all aspects, soul-wise as well as financially…. I was able to donate money to people who were less fortunate. I’ve had the opportunity on every Christmas to give presents to children who are, sadly, orphans, and to kids who suffer from cancer.

 

"I have become an independent woman at 20 years [old], [able] to finish college without the financial support of my parents.

"It is true that you meet a lot of different characters in this online environment, but most of them just need psychological counseling; they need to know that I am always there for them. They need to know I am their confidante and friend, no matter what. I have met many people who were going through a tough time of their life: They have lost their families, they were going through a divorce, [or] they were alcoholics or drug addicts. The fact that I was there for them when they needed someone…to understand them without judgment and to help them get over it, to be able to have a normal life again, has changed their life [and] mine as well. It's an uplifting feeling to know that you could save so many lives."


Eva Lovia

webcam model and adult film performer
 

"My first year in [porn], I started my own company that I began producing content for. I trademarked my name to ensure no one could capitalize on my hard work, which was perfect because I soon would land a contract with a huge company that was notorious for trademarking names of girls they contracted, so when the contract was up they could no longer work under their name. The contract was great in the sense that I had a guaranteed income that was very, very generous…. I was able to earn great wages and still have half the year off to focus on other projects.

"Everything was going well in my career, but at home some things took a turn from bad to worse. My little sister was in a very abusive marriage, and she had two girls under the age of three…. I had her move in with me. [After] she was settled in, I immediately started to see some telltale signs of autism in my niece, who at the time was about to be two years old. Long story short, Madison was diagnosed just after her third birthday, which means she was too old for a lot of services. My sister—a newly single mom with a newly diagnosed child with autism and a one-year-old—was in no emotional or financial position to get all of the services Madison now required….

"This is what led me to start Blue Puzzle Foundation, a nonprofit organization that offers private educational grants to families that want to give their child the best education possible despite their diagnosis. Blue Puzzle Foundation also will give families a trained service animal that helps their child with specific needs.

"I spent the last year traveling, eating, and making some great friendships in the restaurant industry, and then an opportunity fell into our lap. A restaurant in a prime location was unofficially on the market. My husband and I made an offer, and to our surprise, they accepted it. What was once a run-of-the-mill Irish pub is now being transformed into a Japanese pub that serves only ethically raised meat, sustainably caught seafood, and local organic produce. I am very passionate about our impact on the environment, as well as the living conditions of the animals I eat…. I think if we all were a little bit more accountable for what we put on our plates, the benefits would be extraordinary.

"Very few traditional career paths offer the luxury of creating your own schedule, thus allowing you to invest equal, if not more time, into your passions, to develop them into businesses, [and to] offer the opportunity to form multiple streams of automated income. You can work 40 years at a job you’re not passionate about to then retire and live on a fixed income for the rest of your life. There is nothing wrong with that at all, but for those of us that are entrepreneurial and love taking risks, working for someone else doesn’t sound appealing. I have always loved the attention porn has given me, and I love the freedom it has given me even more."


Gabby Daniels

webcam model
 

"As someone who has never done anything in the industry prior to starting to cam with Stripchat, I can honestly say it is one of the best things I’ve ever done. I wish I had started earlier. Not only am I my own boss, but I make my own schedule. It truly is a job, and I attribute my success to the fact that I treat it as [such].

 

"Meeting and interacting with people has definitely been the greatest thing about camming—besides the income, of course. You realize that these are just people, and they enjoy your company and want to spend time with you. I love the connections I have built with fans and even other models on the site. The best feeling is when someone tells me that they were having a really bad day and watching [or] talking to me totally turned all that around. I don’t think people realize that it’s not all about sex: It’s about the human connection.

"I also have been working on a way that I can incorporate charity into my shows. For example, around Christmas I am going to have everyone vote [on] a charity and then give half the proceeds from shows to said charity, or raffle fun things off!."


Harriet Sugarcookie

adult performer, cam girl, model, and blogger
 

"Before porn, I was really shy and had low self-esteem. Since then I've had so much support and lots of experiences that have really boosted my confidence. I learned to love myself and my body….

"Working in porn has really let me stand on my own two feet. There's the financial aspect of it: Before I used to work three minimum-wage jobs to make ends meet, and now I'm successful enough that I run my own company and have full-time staff employed under me. I can work from anywhere in the world. I'm my own boss. I have so much freedom and independence in my life, and that's something truly priceless.

"I've been all over Europe and America for work. Porn has let me visit cities I never thought I'd go to, from glamorous Las Vegas to historic Prague…. My work is also very flexible, and I've been able to spend a lot of time visiting my family back in Vietnam—something I'm so lucky to be able to do.

"I've been able to help a lot of people through my work. For my website, which is a men's lifestyle magazine as well as porn site, I write a lot of articles on dating and sex advice. I've had people write in asking me for advice on how to ask out a girl or how to tackle sexual anxiety. There's also the health articles: We did a big campaign before for prostate cancer, and I had people writing in afterward saying they went to the doctor to get checked after reading my article.

"On Christmas every year, I open up a special email, and I tell everyone that if they're alone on Christmas day, for whatever reason, they can email me, and I'll reply so they won't be alone. Last year I got over 250 emails."


Haven

financial dominatrix
 

"When I was younger, I knew I wanted to work smarter, not harder, and never contribute eight hours [a day] of my time to somebody else’s clock.

 

"My goal was to be able to take care of my mother the way she took care of me, give to charity, change my life, and build an empire. I’ve done all that and then some. I’m 24 with my own luxury apartment—something most people my age in my area are not doing. I take care of my mother, I give back any way I can, and I’m so grateful that it’s so easy for me to be able to help other people. I nap all day, yet my bank account is always growing! I’m able to travel the world, be cultured, see new things. I wish everybody could experience the great things I have with findom."


Jessica Drake

contracted adult film performer, writer, and director
 

"When I first began working in the adult industry, I was most grateful for the fact that I was easily able to afford to live in Los Angeles, pay my bills, and have health insurance. This self-reliance and sustainability was something I had previously been unaccustomed to.

"Volunteering and charity work have always been very important to me, and being a part of the adult industry has also afforded me the ability to support some of my favorite organizations on a much bigger scale than ever before. I have done eight Habitat for Humanity builds internationally, and after those trips I’ve reached out to other NGOs nearby that lack resources. Not only does my 'naked work' fund those ventures; it allows me the time off to help others. Not many people can go to Kenya and Tanzania for five weeks and have a job when they return.

"Travel has been, most likely, my favorite job perk. I have visited 27 countries and have many more on my wish list. Some of these trips have been solely work, but many have been [a] combo [of] work, sightseeing, [and] cultural immersion—teaching me much more than I’ve ever learned in a classroom.

"I also acknowledge and appreciate the platform I’ve been given in this business. I'm grateful for the ability to be a sex educator and provide folks with what I wish I had known growing up. And with no regrets I can say this: My job has led me to exactly where I am today, and I feel extremely lucky."


Jessica Sage

webcam model
 

"Being a cam model has really helped me in a lot [of] ways…. Camming on Stripchat is a secondary source of income for us because my husband does have a full-time job, and we needed a little extra to help us get by. But I did not think it would have helped in the way that it has, and for that I'm grateful. Now I am just saving as much as I can so I can buy a house! It’s overall an awesome job to have, and I really look forward to working because I genuinely have a lot fun and love what I do. Plus, I am able to make my own hours and work when I want to without the stress of punching a time card."


Kayden Kross

adult film performer, director, and producer
 

"When I first started in porn, it afforded me the time and money to attend college classes in a way that, after some time, became almost recreational. At the time I worked less than a week out of every month and collected a six-figure income, so I took a lot of classes that, over time, have been useful as part of the aggregate of what I consider a broad knowledge base. But back then, I was only enrolling in classes I personally found to be interesting. My problem then, and arguably now, is that I didn't know what I wanted to be when I grew up.

"Contributing to the problem of not knowing what I wanted to be when I grew up was the regular world travel that porn afforded me. The constant barrage of publicity events took me to New Zealand, South Africa, Spain, Germany, London, Paris, Australia, Romania, and Italy between road trips—notably one during which I drove up and down the whole of Eastern Europe. Canada and Mexico were a given, of course, and I've seen every state in the nation (once on a porny tour bus!). The available number of things I might think to do when I grew up seemed to increase rather than get narrowed down.

 

"The next thing porn gave me was investment capital. I bought real estate, maxed out my IRA contributions, and put money in the stock market. These things further delayed the pressure of having to decide what I wanted to be when I grew up.

"Finally, porn brought me experience-based knowledge from my time 'in the field.' I directed my first adult film in 2013. In 2014 I won best director for a project I directed with my husband. In 2015 I launched a production studio. Now I direct one movie a month [for] my self-funded, self-directed line, and porn has finally brought me the thing I think I always wanted: It allowed me to indefinitely put off deciding what I will do when I grow up."


Madison Young

performance artist, author, adult film performer, director, and producer
 

"Porn has been an incredibly empowering part of my life in so many ways…. I can look back at the porn I’ve made and see photos from the first time I met my husband, the first time that he placed rope on my body. I have beautiful documentation of some incredibly powerful sexual experiences that I’ve shared with many of my lovers, as well as many of my firsts, like the first time that I was flogged, caned, whipped—or even the first time that I experienced rope in a sexual context.

"The making of porn itself has been a meaningful and powerful experience for me, a container to explore my sexuality and sexual fantasies in depth, frequently, and with many different partners. It is because of porn that I became so very interested in sex education, and that I became such a pro at sexual negotiation. When you are having sex with so many different partners, it becomes key to know yourself and become very assertive and clear in your sexual negotiation.

"Also, over the past 15 years I've been both performing and directing, porn has been my livelihood and an extension of both my art and activism in creating social change and dismantling sexual shame and stigma in our society by documenting and performing authentic sexual experiences in front of the camera.

"Economically, my career in pornography has financially supported my life as an artist, as well as, for over a decade, my feminist art gallery and performance space, which produced over 500 art events, performances, and exhibitions celebrating the diverse work of the feminist, women, trans, sex worker, LGBTQ, and kinky artist communities, in a very visible, storefront art gallery in the heart of San Francisco from 2000 to 2011."


Misty Stone

adult film performer
 

"I think some of the great things I have been able to do since getting into porn have mostly been teaching[-related]. Being able to be a mentor and show young women in the adult industry how to be women in this industry and grow as people and performers.

"I enjoy building people's confidence, helping them find out who they want to be and [how to] express themselves.

 

"I also have enjoyed traveling all around the world. And yes, baby: Because of working in this industry, I have been able to work in and meet people from countries all over the globe."

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